My panic and how it started

Subject: My panic and how it started Mon Apr 28, 2008 7:34 pm

when i had my son my hormones went mental i remember the day well i went downstairs to have a smoke(hadnt had one for 20 hrs) got really dizzy and couldnt breathe i thought i was dying......... i must have looked like a real loonie tune cos i was hanging on to the walls and sweating i grabbed a nurse and said im dying she just looked at me ....like ???????????????.My god i was terrified. I needed to have fresh air circulating around me from that day on. I was sent home with my boy and then the nightmare began. My heart would pound Id break out in a sweat thought i would pass out so off to the drs i went.......... dignosed post natal depression take these and you will be fine ...........ha like hell was i fine.I couldnt leave the house if i did it would start again.. i would cry most days and call the emergency services to take me to hospital cos i was dying maybe did this 3 to 4 days a week only to be told you are not dying and sent home. When i would lay down at night i could hear my heartpounding then it would stop and i would jump up and immediately thought fuck my heart has stopped so i would run to the sink turn tap on and gulp water down my throat because my thought was if i was drinking i cant be dead......... figure that one out. I have had these tests done over the years cos i needed reassurance
thalium scan-heart-once
stress tests -lost count
holter monitor-10 times
mri brain-2 times
emergency department by ambulance-100 and above
ultra sounds different parts of my body-10 or more
x-rays-10 or more
numerous other tests-many
shrinks-many
therapists-many
physcoligists-many
So my life at that time consisted of me taking anti-depressants,xanax by the bucket load.
i could go on and on but will leave it for now i will let u know how easy it s for you to not keep your thinking true ........i hadnt had a smoke for 20 hrs of course im gonna get dizzy and have a head spin....when you lay down yes you can hear your heart but after a while your body relaxes and you cant hear it anymore.......
would be great to hear others stories
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